Kupuna Caregiver: Kat Trilles Inspired by Mom

Kupuna Caregiver

Kat Trilles has  been a shining star at Home Instead Senior Care and has been making a difference daily since becoming a caregiver in 2013. But it wasn’t always like that.​

“Our mother and daughter relationship was difficult because we were always arguing. That’s how we were. She was really stubborn, hard and very demanding,” says Trilles.​

Kat cared for her mom, dad and uncle starting in the late 1990’s while working a full time job and raising her daughter.​

“How did I do that? That’s crazy but I did it. I had too. If not me, who’s going to do it? You just have to do it,” says Trilles.​

But there were lessons to be learned after mom passed away in 2001.​

“When you’re taking care of your own parents, you’re in a box. You don’t know what’s going on in the outside world. So when she passed away, I went through a range of emotions of feeling guilty, feeling bad, feeling why I didn’t do that, why I didn’t do this,” says Trilles.     ​

She has this advice to other caregivers.​

“Have patience with your own parents. Give them care, give them love, give them consideration which I didn’t give my mom because I was too frustrated already, too irritable. I was suffering from caregivers burnout. But it’s too late for me because my mom passed. So what you do is you love your parents because you never know when God is going to take them away,” says Trilles.​

But before mom passed, they had a heart to heart conversation.​

“I told her I’m sorry. I was crying already and said I’m sorry I yelled at you too much. I sorry I got mad at you and all this bickering. But she put up her right hand and made a tear gesture because she couldn’t talk and said it was okay. That moment stays with me,” say Trilles.

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