Honolulu (KHON2) – Parent Coach Karen Gibson shares three tips that will help children succeed later in life.
“Learning how to talk to people/emotionally connect with others, managing their own assignments/money management skills/responsibilities as well as handling their personal problems are the top 3 life skills children need to be taught,” says Gibson. “These skills aren’t taught in schools so it’s up to parents to make the time to prepare their kids to be a successful adults.”
She says to provide your child with opportunities where they order their own food, talk to nonfamily members to get out of their comfort zone and get them out of their comfort zone. Don’t remind them about homework deadlines. Teach them how to be accountable. Lastly, don’t give them money or grant their request every time they ask for something. Teach them how bank accounts work, take a class as a family on money management/investments and turn it into a fun activity to practice ways to invest their money wisely, instead of spending money foolishly.
Gibson says disappointment is a healthy emotion and it’s necessary for children to feel it. “We don’t want to shield our children from disappointment as it is a critical to build resiliency,” adds Gibson. “Failure is a part of life. Teaching kids to fail and bounce back makes them stronger and more ready to face life’s challenges. When kids fear failing, they’re at risk for anxiety and meltdowns when things go wrong.”
She adds that parents need to stop themselves from fixing their kids problems and preventing them from emotional pain.
Our instinct is to comfort a crying child by fixing their problem. She says we need to reframe our mindset and see that we are not responsible for our children’s problems and it’s not our job to rescue them. Practice compassion and say, “It sounds like you’re going through a rough time” and listen to what’s going on.
When parents prevent a child from experiencing the emotional pain, they rob their kids from building resilience. When kids learn that life will be tough, but they’ll get through it, they’ll stop seeing themselves as a victim. Children need to see problems as an opportunity to grow. So, they learn they don’t GO through challenges, they GROW through challenges.
Gibson is part of a Facebook group, Aloha Mindset Parenting, with Melo (a mindset & success strategist) and Deslynn (an empowerment coach), and she encourages parents to join their group.
These sessions are available as a replay on her YouTube channel: Letting Go with Aloha.
Website:www.Lettinggowithaloha.com (parent coaching)
www.karenthebrainbuilder.com (tutoring services)
YouTube channel: Letting Go with Aloha
Private Facebook Group: STRESSED MOM SUPPORT GROUP BY A HAWAII MOM